Sometimes I think weekends exist out of time.
I lose track of what day (and often hour) it is. After a week of blow-drying my hair every morning and almost getting eaten by my diffuser, my hair sits atop my head in a ponytail or (if I’m feeling really ratty) a topknot. I begin to call a cookie a meal. The miracle of brunch makes alcohol acceptable before noon. And since I don’t yet have my company-issued phone, I’m not instantaneously accessible to my colleagues.
I am an umbrella assassin.
There’s just no other term for it. No matter how many umbrellas I buy, no matter how cheap or expensive they are, they never last more than a few months. Inevitably the fabric starts to separate from the spokes (…I’ve decided the metal parts are called spokes), the open/close mechanism refuses to open/close, and the entire thing just snaps inside-out at the slightest gust of wind.
One morning a few weeks ago, my umbrella broke literally five feet from my apartment door. I was forced to make the rest of my commute holding the mangled fabric of the umbrella corpse over my head, struggling for some semblance of shield from the increasing downpour. Not only did that attempt fail, but the runoff from my dying umbrella streamed right down the sleeve of my coat in the process.
Whew, what a week I’ve had.
I moved into my new apartment over Labor Day weekend! After carrying boxes and pieces of furniture and assorted pieces of my life up and down staircases for the entirety of Saturday, I felt–and looked–like I’d been beaten up. I don’t even remember colliding with my dresser, but the bruises on my shins beg to differ.
August. The month that gives meaning to the term “the dog days of summer.” Like many of the other bloggers whose posts I read, I’m in total disbelief that it’s already halfway through the month–and that summer is nearly over. Now, don’t get me wrong, the days upon days of sweltering heat seem plenty long while I’m in ’em, but I turned around and all of you who’ve got kiddies are posting back-to-school pictures. What?!
(Nerd consolation: I’m going back to school this year too! Time to go to Staples!! Buying notebooks = one of my favorite things.)
Hey guys! It’s Tara–remember me? Huh? Curly haired girl with an inordinate love for cookies?
I know, I know; I’ve sort of dropped off the face of the earth these past couple of weeks. I spent a week in sunny California with my family for my cousin’s wedding (take me back to the beach, please! That’s the Huntington Beach pier, above, with Ruby’s Diner all the way out at the end–best.milkshakes.ever.). And the week after that was full of overdue work emails and apartment hunting (yes, again)…
So, can we agree that the Fourth of July is just weird this year? I mean, it couldn’t get more awkward than having a holiday that is just made for weekend BBQing on a Wednesday. Of all days.
When do you take your long weekend? Do you take vacation on Monday and Tuesday and then still have the tail end of a week left? Or, do you call out Thursday and Friday and have a post-Fourth party. (Or are you like me, and not in possession of enough vacation days to take any time off? True story. Bummer.)
Hey there, friends. I know I was MIA here on Chip Chip Hooray last week–sorry about that. Things in these parts have been crazy–Baby Chip turned sweet 16, bestest friends got engaged, the Hunger Games movie came out–but I have been writing! …just not here. Hah.
So to make it up from you, I’m giving you two wonderful things today: cookies that you can eat for breakfast (um, fabulous), and free stuff!
You love me again now, right? That’s what I thought.